A question of IQ.

Ok I know this is coming from the guy with the Dora hat on...Yesterday began as any normal day. Get up, get ready, slam some food in my face and get to work. All the news stories I was monitoring were still relatively the same as I had left them the night before. Climate change conference in Copenhagen is still spinning its political wheels and will continue to remain in neutral. The biggest factor that keeps climate change policies ineffective is simply that large rich nations, who do the most polluting, don’t want to lose any economic footholds so they create inadequate policies and procedures that appear to be doing at least something but in reality accomplish nothing.

Financial markets on the rise but not in a manner that should really seem exciting or promising. Our Canadian dollar is continuously getting stronger but as my big boss (Carney) states; Canadians need to be smart about their debt in case interest rates go up and Canadian financial institutions need to be cautious on not only lending to “high risk” households but to all households. The tricky part is the idea that strong domestic spending will assist our economy to stay strong against U.S. demand.

Then I checked into the “periphery” stories, Ottawa’s light rail, O’Brian is attempting to thwart a strike with a lockout, 70 car pileup, Tiger is still a douche and so on. While I was reading the mornings articles I happened to hear that KISS and Rush were both passed up to be inducted to the Rock and Roll Hall of fame. Who made it in, in their stead you might ask? A POP BAND, wait scratch that, A DISCO POP BAND....ABBA. Ok fine that didn’t really make sense to me but whatever I kept reading my articles and went on with my day.

Then it was about 8:06 AM when I realized that there was truly no rock god any more. I have a feeling that he/she has taken so many bad blows with all the embarrassing acts and lack of talent they call the music industry today, he/she hung themselves with a guitar string. Or possibly went to a place where they don’t listen to music, like Utah or the Deep South. This was further realized when I looked back on the past decade of music after reading this article and it was obvious that it has been a pathetic decade. If you are unaware of what I am referring to it is the fact that Nickleback was named the top band of the decade by billboard. How is this possible? They are terrible, lack originality and their lead singer sounds like a retarded hillbilly who acts tough but is a whinny little bitch.

Musically they have a combined IQ of 66.7 in real life -well let’s face it who cares about their lives- and this IQ on the IQ chart is what I figured it was when I looked at it 55 - 70 Mild Mental Disabilty, and that is there combined IQ. Their lead singer is an embarrassment to the rock world in so many ways. For example when he was hit with a bottle on stage at a metal concert (because metal fans want metal music, not pop rock, or whatever it is they play) in Europe, he merely asked the crowd something to the effect of “do you want to hear rock or not” when he got hit the second time - which was awesome I might add - they walked off stage.

Now what do real rock stars do when this happens? Let’s look at another musician -sorry- a real musician, Josh Homme from Queens of the Stone Age. The guy is performing and is reportedly sick from a cold or flu and some dolt in the crowd throws something at him. Fine. Homme not only curses this moron out but calls him out. Once his barrage is completed he returns to his music and continues performing. This was merely the first example that came to mind of a proper response when hit on stage...

Rolling Stone Magazine said they lacked originality and that if you were looking for something original ask for a full refund and not a nickleback...they also went on to saying that listening to their songs makes you almost happy that Kurt Cobain is not around to hear it. Blender tore them apart as do many music authors working for record labels or various magazines all basically stating...well they just suck.

Why if so many people hate them do they get this nomination? It is rather simple and you don’t have to have an IQ higher than 80 to figure it out. The majority of their popularity comes from the radio and those younger generations who listen to the music as a means of entertainment or to pass the time. Fine I have no qualms with that. But what this does is promote what is mainstream music and what is “hot” on the top 40. Thus these boneheads (NB) get more air time than other more extremely talented and musically endowed bands.

Now there is a reason that I did not run out and start randomly punching teenage girls in the face for promoting this garbage. It lies in the simple fact that those who enjoy music would never promote this band through ticket sales or CD’s alike. Billboard wants to make $$$ so does Nickleback. You take one of the top producing bands (in this past decade it is not hard to be that band) and you promote them to the top. Funny thing, magazines in the UK have nominated NB as the worst band of all time.

So I take solace in the idea that although these guys are getting way much more attention and money then they deserve, I know that I can put my iPod on and play my music in which those morons are not in the same...hell there is nothing I can say there...they just don’t belong in music.

I promise this...if I see the band on the street I will be sure to run up to them and ask for an autograph. As he starts putting pen to paper I will state: “Wow, I now have the autograph of the worst musician (I use that loosely) of all time.” When he looks up and attempts to come up with some form of retort and his pathetic brain is reeling in fear for not having any logic or thought process, I will kick him as hard as I can in the groin to ensure that there will not be any offspring possible from that brainless greasy douche!